7 TV Judges, Ranked By Surliness
Daniel Bonfiglio
Published
06/05/2024
in
Funny
Ever since The People's Court with Joseph Wapner took over our screens in 1981, we've been obsessed with courtroom reality TV shows and watching incredibly smart judges school incredibly stupid people; each judge with their own level of surliness.
So, we decided to rank them by it. And if you don't like the ranking you can get out of my courtroom!
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1. Judge Judy Sheindlin
The most famous of all TV judges, Judy was the supervising judge of the Manhattan district, and her show Judge Judy ran for 25 seasons until 2021. She is the definition of no nonsense, and sets the standard for controlling a courtroom. She has more viral moments than you can count, but here are two memorable ones. -
2. “That one’s irritating me, can you get rid of her?”
Judy kicks out a defendant’s new girlfriend when it is revealed the pair sleep on a mattress his ex purchased. -
3. “Not interested Chris!”
Judge Judy shuts up the witness to a car accident, deeming his opinion irrelevant before kicking him out of the courtroom. -
4. Judge Lauren Lake
Judge Lake was a criminal defense attorney before singing background for several high profile artists such as Jay-Z. She frontlined “Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court,” and now stars in “e the People with Judge Lauren Lake.” She is known for firmly putting bad parents in their place. -
5. “Let’s get this straight. I address what I want to address in the order that I want to address it.”
Judge Lake quickly gets tired with a couple’s quarreling when a child’s life is on the line. -
6. Judge Marilyn Milian
Judge Milian served in the Miami Circuit Court’s Criminal Division. In 2012, she took over “People’s Court,” the first and longest running court reality show. She still hosts the show with her no-nonsense attitude. -
7. “Forget it cuz I changed my mind. He kicked my door.”
A man accused of damaging a car door by kicking it does himself no favors by kicking Judge Milian’s courtroom doors on his way out. -
8. “You’re dead wrong. That’s my ruling pal. You’ve got a lot to learn about what it means to be a litigator and be a lawyer.”
Judge Milian doesn’t take kindly to this recent law school grad thinking he knows more than her. -
9. Judge Lynn Toler
Judge Toler served as the only Judge in the Cleveland Heights Municipal Court from 1994 to 2000. From 2006 to 2020, she presided over “Divorce Court.” -
10. “It’s Judge Toler.”
Judge Toler quickly asserts herself to both parties after being called “Ms. Girl,” and “Ms. Toler” in this viral moment. -
11. Judge Faith Jenkins
Faith Jenkins was an Assistant District Attorney, prosecuting criminals at the Manhattan District Attorney’s Office, as well as a legal contributor on several major networks. In 2014 she started hosting “Judge Faith,” and now presides over “Divorce Court.” -
12. “It’s not whatever. It’s whatever I say.”
Unhappy with the ruling, one man mutters “whatever” under his breath. Bad decision. -
13. “When I ask you a question, you answer it, and if I want to interrupt you, I’m going to interrupt you.”
Judge Jenkins has no time for a man who thinks she’s not listening to him. -
14. Judge Greg Mathis
Originally involved in Detroit gang activity as a young man, Judge Mathis became a Michigan 36th District Court judge. Judge Mathis is the second longest running host of a courtroom show. -
15. “Where’s the love, all I hear is toughness?”
Judge Mathis is moved to tears when talking to an uncle who is overly hard on his nephew who has moved in with him to escape Oakland gang activity. This story hits close to home, and Judge Mathis says he’s all for tough love, but then delivers this line. -
16. Judge Joseph Wapner
The original host of “The People’s Court, Wapner was the first TV judge. Although his day and age means he can’t stack up to his contemporaries in the sass department, he still has his moments. -
17. “You have no legal basis.”
Judge Wapner is less than pleased that a man thinks he knows more than him about the law.”
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